Turns out you can't make Mountain Dew glow with just a few common household ingredients.
And I'm sorry to be the bearer of bad tidings, but you can't bypass a modern car alarm and open your locked vehicle using a tennis ball with a small hole in it.
Some people will believe anything.
But I am willing to suspend disbelief when David Churbuck says you can resurrect a dead IBM ThinkPad using a secret power button code! The only trouble is, to debunk the previous two theories took very little investment. To test the veracity of this one requires that my T43 have a coronary. So I'm going with David, a fine fellow of admirable character. Remember, for the life of your laptop may depend on it: "10 times in a row at one second intervals, press and hold for 30 seconds." But don't leave out the bit about the battery, power cord and invocation of the Big Blue God or you will be stuck shelling out for a new computer on eBay.